school's over. so many things goin on during the hols. i really pray hard that i can cope. there's practically NO time for me to slack.



i tried to be perfect. it just wasn't worth it. i dunno how it got so bad.



all of a sudden. it feels like the world is on me. everyone is coming to me and saying loads of things. bad. and. good.



everybody's changing and i don't feel the same.



looking back, i think that i have changed so much. so have the people around me. why cant things just remain as they were? why must there be changes.



i don't want these things happening to be a part of my life. it's sick man.



it seems like i'm the only one clinging on to the past. everyone change. me too, yet i hope for the past. stupid. naive. immature. me.

here to blog.
so fast. 5months have come and gone.
and i feel like i have accomplished NOTHING.
that's pathetic.
today had a TONGUE-LASHING from mrs das. dusty. haha.
she was literally comparing us to the other classes lah.
and she shouted. screamed. yelled. at us.
for 45mins.
many who failed either sciences,
were advised to DROP.
that's me.
thiru gave me 2 choices.
1)drop pure phy. take pure bio.
2)drop pure phy. take sc phy-bio.
i gave her ___ ans.
she said she'd call my mum to check with her.


my mum told me to go for option2. so i'll be takin sub phy-bio. but..
i'm an ANTI-PHYSICS person.
my results tell it all.
i will have nothing to do with physics.
but in this situation.
it is no longer a compromise.
it's a "take it or leave it" issue.
i have to take it.
or else.
i'll be doom.
GOD PLEASE SAVE ME.


discussed UG camp aft sch.
i forgot everything i spoke.
GOSH.
scary.
we were discussing about the proposals.
left sch ard 6.45


today is officially our last training with ms qiu.
only huimin n xiuwen were there.
quite a let-down.
me n jac really wanted to go trng.
but we had to prioritise.
everyone was busy.
funny.
it's during post-exam time that everyone cant make it.
dis is ironic.


what is life without problems. troubles. sorrows. anguish.
it is through these that we improve our lives.
look on the brightside.
dont we all need them?

today went for olgc walk to do cip. kinda lame, stand in the sun for 3hours. whoa, chatted with tang and anne tan for a long time. anne tan is paradoxically lethargic. yes. i found out. =))

after tt, i went compass to meet sam and khiu, den went to meet sharon after finishing the cip thing.


den we went to Heeren to watch the perfect10 dares you to. we met carla on the way there. OMG. it's totally sick. the first act was putting a fishball into a sock, jamie yeo squished it, stepped on it and DARED a guy to eat it. for 20bucks, the guy did it. WOW.
den the second act was 2 ppl were called on stage to use their feet to squash a whole plate of papayas. one person was wearing footwear summore. that's the WORST part. den one guy came up and was DARED to lick the papaya on the person's feet. EWWW. and 2 other ppl were DARED to lick and dunk their faces with the squashed papayas. goodness. that was.. WHOA.third act was silly. they DARED a girl to run to every level and shout "PERFECT 10 DARED ME TO". so simple can. and she was given 20bucks. who cannot do it. the forth act was that this guy was DARED to find an apple from the dustbin, and eat it up, and french-kiss his girlfren. well, when he found the apple, it was soaking WET. and stinked. he ate the whole apple for 50bucks. and for french-kissing his girlfren, his girlfren got 20bucks. altogether 70bucks. well, the last and final act was GRUESOME. there were 25,000 mealworms in a tank that was put in a storeroom for 2weeks. thus it totally smelt. n they put 3mothballs inside the tank and the person was DARED to used only his mouth to get the mothballs. den this little ang-moh boy came up to stage. he think he very cool lah. this ang-moh boy was screaming to the DJs to call him on stage since the first act. when he was finally called, he CHICKEN-OUT. HAHAH.this is totally hilarious. he did not dare to put his face into the tank. the whole crowd as jeering at him la. haha. in the end another guy went up, and DID it. whoa, that's really brave. i take my hat off him.






when it was over, we went to cine to eat long john. got the big coke. oh man, stomach corrosion. kept burping, expressing myself to sharon. den we walked and walked, and burped and burped. den sharon wanted to go home. therefore, we went home. see how sacrificial we are. and now i dunno wad to do. it's boring at home.

today got back even more papers. let's see. so far, got eng, emath, chinese, amaths, chem, physics, ss, history. oh wow, i got back all my papers already. it was bad. i might hafta drop physics. n i kinda opted for pure bio? i dunno if i did the right thing. if you're reading this, pls gif me your earnest opinion. =)
the red mack is physics. complete horror.
today was very relax in class. was vandalising athens, christi, lucia n sharon's SPO. i'm trying to add loads of colours to my book. it's so dull and boring. tons of crap in it. and i found out out something terrifying, was um-chio-ing so much can. oh mann. at this rate i'm going, can easily get breat cancer. anyway. went home early. 2pm. lol. slept from 2.30-6.30. shiok man. replenished much of my sleep. and now i can't watch Get Real becos my dad was angry with me over a damn puny thing. he's always so pretty without the 'r'.. guess i'll watch the repeat telecast? yeah..
i've got 8more days to my doom. that is, parent teacher meeting. YES.

today got back even more papers and i totally crumbled. oh, the results seriously TURN ME OFF. GOD please save me. PHYSICS is my terror. my fear. my guilt. my pain. i can't drop physics. not now, when i'm already halfway through.
SS was humorous. 8ppl in my class passed. EVERYONE was badly traumatised by this fateful news told by limpy. she's damn cute larh. told us our ss marks but gave us back our history paper. means to say, i also know my elective marks. whoa, i must say, it wasn't any better. just scrape through.
PHYSICS was the ultimate KILLER. i literally froze when i sae my paper. dunno whether to LAUGH or cry. obviously i didn't cry becos this sorta things aren't worth crying about. neither did i laugh becos this is definitely not a cheerful issue or laughing matter.
when over to 3E to "seek refuge" from my hell of a class. big thanks to sam, polar, khiu for all that you all told me, i feel so much better. yeah.. at least now i dun feel so depressed.
IF i can ever get to keep my physics,i will STRIVE hard to do my best, for my Os. GOD PLEASE GIVE ME WISDOM TO DO THE RIGHT THINGS.
after school had basketball trng. rained till 4plus, during which we talked about many things such as our positions, jerseys, etc. good news is that.. i'm the treasurer!!! long awaited dream come true. hia hia. $_$ <--MONEY-FACED
training was fun cos we praticed passes. shootings. 3pointers. and played match. funny and truckloads of laughs as always.

























































































































































































































































































































































































































































































you mean this much to me.

today is charis's birthday.. tomorrow, it's eunice png's birthday.. HAPPIE BIRTHDAY..

went back to school today.. boring. slept thru chinese, got scolded by taychewfern twice, keep telling me to wake up. worst thing was that i was seated in front, haha. feel so bad.

my results are out. chinese and emaths. oh mann, was lyk shit. i'm really scared. so NOT gonna do well.

realised a bad thing today. i cant believe it. i'm utterly shocked. but wad to do. HAHA. kinda funny actually. laugh out loud.

june hols is gonna be one busy one. 6th-9th june, UG camp. 8th-10th june, tripartite camp. 13th-15th june, youth walk. 17th june, Pulau Ubin outing. 18th-22th june, KL and Genting. haha.. Week 2 and 3 fully occupied. week1 and week3 gonna go school for POP training.

can't wait till next week. where there's NO more school.

.PEACE OUT.

How could this happen to me
I made my mistakes
I’ve got no where to run
The night goes on
As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

exams are over and i am so free now. today went PA with rachel to hand in the hongkong trip cheques. den we went seoul garden with waisum. ate so much lyk nobody's business. later wenfeng n sam came. i ate MORE. we ate from 1.30 to 4.30. 3hours. not bad eh.

went wisma. den pacific plaza, rachel bought this pair of striped roxy slippers which i think is not as nice as the brown one. oh well. den far east, looked around fro ear-rings but there were too many. n lastly, waisum n I left. reported HOME to eat dinner.

decided to change skin. reason 1: was kinda sick of that poor little boy in the previous skin. reason 2:look at the first paragraph, first line.

WHEEEEEEE!!!!! the exams are over. and i am OVER the moon. but i think i badly screwed all my papers. oh thats bad. and i dun wanna face the music. oh man, results are always the WORST parts. dis is all part of life and growing, i'll outgrow it someday. yea.. someday maybe.. but dunno why, dis SA1, although i din really put in A LOT of effort, i feel SO stressed up. though it was kinda luxurious that we had our exams in the hall, fully air-conditioned. but i was always terrified before EVERY paper. guess i really hope to keep all my subjects. i never felt so stressed and full of pressure before. that's funny..

today had basketball training. supposed to start at 1.45. but started at 2.15. went opposite to play. had some drills. but were damn slack lah. heh. played matches most of the time. was quite fine but i lost touch of basketball as much as i thought i have. but i'll work on it. as usual, much laughs during the matches. and much injuries for me too. broken nail, sprained ankle, blistered toe, blue-black hand, broken specs(as always), hit by the ball a couple of times. whoa, i missed all these so much. it's been lyk 3 odd months since i stepped into the court. ms ong kept a close eye on me and made sure i din stay back aft school to play bball and made sure i go home and study. But i nvr really studied. went home to sleep.

today had chem paper. i think it's tough. esp the percentage yield that part. oh my goodness. was seeing stars lah. and mcq was surprisingly DIFFICULT. yes. calculations of RMM was involved. of the mole as well. oh well, i totally suck at chemical equations. gotta work on it if i wanna keep chem. and i really want to. but physics is a GONE CASE. it was real nightmare. thiru set the paper, and the questions were so difficult. wow. for a moment i thought how come thiru was able to set such intelligent and high-standard questions. and then huiying told me MAJORITY of the questions were from 10year series. oh shit man! my 10year series was in the locker and i totally forgot about it. freak man! but it's over, nothing i can do about it.

I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO STRENGTHENS ME.

ASK AND YOU SHALL BE GIVEN.

THE LORD GIVES FREELY AND ABUNDANTLY TO THOSE WHO SPEAK UP AND ASK.

DO NOT WORRY ABOUT TOMORROW FOR TODAY HAS ENOUGHS WORRIES OF ITS OWN.

GRIEVE NO MORE FOR THE JOY OF THE LORD IS YOUR STRENGTH

love all these verses. they really ease me of all my troubles, problems, fears, anxieties and all.

but sometimes you just cant let go of somethings and somethings just cannot be erased from your mind. it's being engraved in your mind permanently. although you wish you could just let go, focus on something else, you cant. you think about it, keep brooding over it. everything i thought of, was just a waste of time, completely redundant and calls for nothing but pain and heart-ache memories.