friend: oh so you're in CJC now.?
me: yeap!
friend: that's good. are you enjoying yourself there?
me: yeap!
friend: good.! so wad is your cca?
me: errrr...
LONG LONG LONG (TEN MILLION YEARS) PAUSE...
me: fitness club.
friend: huh? isn't that taf club???
me: no luhh!
friend: then??
me: it's working out at the gym la.
friend: ohhh. why so slack? i thought u sec sch np one?
me: ai ya, jc now only 2 years, wanna focus on studies la.
friend: but won't fitness club appear slack for your jc testimonial?
me: ai ya, nobody cares about testimonial la. see sec4 testimonial, so damn suck la.
friend: quite true.


that is the typical convo i go through every single time someone asks about my cca.
and today is friday.
usually for fridays, i NEVER reach home before 7pm.
since sec1, it's been 7.30.
and it'll be a shagged and exhausted rowena.
even for first three months,
canoeing did not spare me with their weekly macritchie training.
and now?
fitness club ends promptly at five every wednesday,
and there's not training on friday!
ha, a STARK contrast from secondary school.
i cant help but feel so useless.
when i see my other friends who used to join library and media in sec sch and are now in odac, or track, or canoeing in their JCs, i cant help but feel so inferior and unaccomplished.
and yet i'm not willing to fork out my time and sacrifice for a better cca.
i contemplated canoe and odac,
but seeing my friends, i back out.
i feel so ashamed that the reason i back out is because i don't want to go through the torture and the ardous long training hours.
and i think to myself.
is this wad npcc has taught me? to slack?
no, definitely not.
it's me, my own part.
i suddenly have the urge to just FLY past my jc years away.
but running away from reality isn't going to solve anything man.
a good friend has been telling me to take heart.
and create the best situation out of everything.
since i am now in fitness,
be the best that i can be.
you might think it's funny,
but i've thought of striving hard,
and being fitness club president.
okay okay,
laugh as you might wish.
but i hope i achieve and accomplish at least something which i can look back twenty years from now and feel proud and honourable about.
this plus nyaa,
(i'm trying for nyaa gold)
i earnestly hope it reflects well for my portfolio.
of course,
the ultimate reason i chose a slack cca was because i wanted to focus on studies.
to concentrate and not get distracted.
ace my A levels. (ha. i wish)
and go to SMU.
yay!
but for now,
i shall focus on short-sighted goals.

NAPFA is coming up and i'm working on it.
i cling onto high hopes for my 2.4km run.
For standing broad jump,
i jus pray HARD for > 169cm.
for the past few years have been getting 15mins for 2.4.
recent pb, 12.34min.
damn happy and surprised.
i'll continue to work hard.
run with the sun!
heh.