from your eyes i saw tears roll down, and i realised that having a difficult life and crying at times are not all that unpleasant.

this phrase is from goong!
haha.
yea,
i'm at it again!
xD

yesterday we went to bukit timah, beauty world centre
to get school uniforms.
in the end,
they only sold the guys pants there.
trip wasted,
good thing i bought the uniforms in school.
after bukit timah,
me char ezra andre went back to serene centre,
island creamery.
i ate chocolate and brandied cherry icecream!
nice!
after eating icecream,
we took a bus to Holland Village cos andre wanted to eat
katong laksa!
after that,
we went to vivocity to walk.
wanted to go to the playground but it was flooded with kids.
loads of kiddos.
so we jus walked around,
and we went home after that cos char was tired..

these few days have been quite challenging for me.
many new problems surfacing.
problems that i did not expect to come my way this fast.
i foresaw these problems,
but not so soon.
i really have no idea how to solve them
and i know i cant do them on my own,
i'm just going to let time past by.
let the problem slowly subside.
all this issue about trust,
and loyalty.
ended up as all bullshit.
ah.
screw the whole thing.
i don't know what is on her mind.
she is making him go crazy.
and not only him, but them.
and here i am,
standing at one side,
he needs help,
i don' t know how to help.
i myself feel so useless!
wad is this?
haha.
madness.
i hope she grows up.

today went jurong east!
am quite tanned,
but not very..
oh well.
tmr having bridging from 8-12.
i need to go,
cos i really honeymoon-ed my first three months thru.
oops!
guilty!
hahaaha.

went to matilda's cousin's wedding ceremony at st anne's church.
sang those songs.
and ate at the buffet reception.
after which went home and change,
then went to meet charmaine ezra and aaron
to watch movie,
we watched primeval.
was quite cliche, i thought..
yea.
then later went back to serangoon gardens
and talked with char and ezra.
crap la the two of them.
haha.
after that went to meet anna janetta huimin zhiying.
at chomp chomp for dinner.
ate lots.
talked a lot too.
so oily!
so sinful!
haha.
but it was nice.
went ice cube after that,
but i was utterly broke!
so restrained from spending.
=D

new class.
new people.
but some old people remained.
really sad,
char isn't in the same class.
but she's trying real hard to appeal to our class.
our class has reached the max of 26 people per class.
stupid extras,
get out la..
HAHA
just kidding.
but i want char in our class, badly!!
don't know wad i'll do without her.

i skipped orientation,
totally don't know my IG,
and don't know half of my class.
but who cares,
i'm contented with presently knowing the first half of my beloved class.
i miss 13.

after school reopen,
it will be dragon boat with our class at kallang.
should i go???
another round of nonsense.
hahaha.
still remember O1,
it was in the rain when we did our amazing race,
was so fun.
i miss the company,
the people.
but we can't have it all,
can we?

ah!!
screw that person*
screw that other person*
i know they're in this together la.
so freaking obviously!
but there's nothing i can do.
i cant acccuse them.
that person is too smart for me.
am i jus stupid?
i dont know. seriously.

ponned orientation today.
they're doing the same as orientation one.
so i am just too lazy to go thru it all over again.
oh well.
slacking at home,
will go out with baby later to nyp to appeal for her nursing course.
then i don't know what's gonna happen next.

hai.
supposed to go out today.
with classmates,
but char didnt wanna go,
then ezra didnt wanna go.
so we decided to just cancel it.
i look forward more to tmr's orientation where
we'll be in our classes.
alright!
thats the main course!
hahahaha.
i pray hard that we can stay together as a class.
=D

but then again,
how much do i actually want this?
badly? or not so much?
i really don't know.
but this is really bothering me.
oh well.

that person is doing all these things in purpose to spite me!
i think so.
has that person ever thought of my feelings?
hahahahahaha.
this is simply hilarious.
wadeva.
today i'm so bored.
no particular place to go.
bored bored bored.
anyway.
i heard that march holidays are going to be even more boring.
oh man.
that sucks.
damn it.
i should start planning my programmes eh.
if not
i just jolly well ROT at home 24/7.

so far,
i know that mindy and nicolette are coming cj.
and nicolette's doing same combi!
hooray!
i'm simply elated.
the usual people are also staying.
i don't know how i'm going to survive two years with those people in class,
always doing that to piss me off.
saddens me much,
but there's really nothing i can do.
right?
well,
hopefully this is just a transition,
and that it'll be over soon.
my goodness.
this shit life really irks me.

it really sucks living behind her shadows.
it's all about her.
what about me?
what am i to anyone?
nothing i guess.
just nothing.
i don't give a fuck.

today was quite okay,
cos of good A level results,
school ended at 12.
stayed in school after that to take class photo
and had lunch with some classmates.
then watched captain's ball matches.

told charmaine everything today
and i really feel better.
it's like a whole rock lifted off my shoulder.
i heave a sigh of relief-
but my problem is not solved yet.
but at least i know char will be there when i need her.
hopefully.
my friend.

after which went to shaw lido to meet baby.
watched pursuit of happiness.
quite a meaningful and emotional show.
it is nice.
then we walked to heeren,
to check out lanyards and pencil case.
but to no avail.
i saw a simple black adidas lanyard.
nice,
but don't have that small string thing to hook thru the phone.
so didn't buy.
i want shawn's lanyard!
i like that colour!
but dun wanna copy him leh.
i shall wait and see.
for nicer ones.

tomorrow going out with athena!
yay!
can't wait!
i don't know why.
maybe i long to see a familiar face,
whom i can crap with,
and jus reminisce old times with.
haha
so emo.
but thats just rowena! (:

i'm
- failing my tests.
- emo-ing.
- showing attitude.
- eating .
- going out.
- not wanting to go home.
- spending.

too much everyday!

my life is screwed up la.
i'm self-inflicting all these sadness
why why why!?


yesterday night,
i dreamt of my class.
as in 1T13.
and how i wish things could go back to square ONE.
when we first started out.
things were going so fine, so smoothly,
until all the true colours started to surface.
all the ugly selfish sides.
i dreamt that our class was smiling, laughing happily.
everyone was innocent and just enjoying the time we were with each other.
that night was probably finale night,
day six of orientation one.
and we were on a bus.
it was so fun,
although we did not know each other well,
it was a light-hearted moment.
and everyone was there, enjoying each other's presence.
he was there too.
sitting in front of me.
he was laughing, his usual self.

why cant things remain the same?
why must there be changes?
changes that pain me?
tell me tell me!
i don't want these changes.
i miss those days.
macdonalds was simple,
but the times spent were priceless.
totally enjoyable.
i want them back,
badly.
can you bring them back to me?

gonna have family dinner later!

today went to the track to run,
saw many people.
ester and her friends.
and kendra and claudine!
kendra was as slack as ever!
walked six rounds.
haha.
ester they all were practicing for track meet on friday.
i don't miss sjc.
seriously.
i don't know why.
i think i'm abnormal.
oh my..

tuesday is posting day.
i'm for CJ.
yes!
to those people whom i lied to,
whom i told that i would be going SA,
i'm sorry.
please accept my apologies.
really am sincere.
i'm staying in CJ.
be happy!

yay!
first and foremost!
i wanna say that i passed my maths test!
i'm so happy!
at least i'm not last in class.
hehh

today school ended at 12.
went out with charmaine and ezra.
felt like a freaking light bulb,
aww man,
rowena you suck.
hahaha.
went to watch a movie with char, dreamgirls.
quite emo!
hahaha,
then went to see char's friends at haagen daaz (however you spell it)
but they had no rum raisin!!
oh no!

after that went back to kovan.
talked to sam for a while at the bus stop.
catch up after i was "deprived" of her for two weeks.
HAHA
was a good chat.
yea.
i heard odac gonna climb three hills tmr,
all the BUKITs.
hahaha.
all the best sam and aggie!
:D